
Nayaswami Mary lived at Ananda Village for a number of years, where she had a jewelry business, traveling to crafts fairs on the West Coast to sell her wares. She says, “For me, business can be spiritual. It is very satisfying when one can use business as a way to give, share, and love – in that way it is beautiful. Since I’ve been running the Ananda Assisi Boutique I’ve been going deeper in love and service to my fellow beings. It’s been a way to perfect myself, as well as helping others.”
Q: How did you get interested in business?
Mary: When I left college I worked for a company that made acrylic flowers. I started making similar items and selling them to stores and the public, and it was then that I discovered I liked business – I liked the freedom of being self‑employed, and the idea that I could determine my own income by the amount of energy I put into it.
My business has changed quite a bit since then. I used to feel that I needed to do a hard sell, and that once I had a potential buyer in my aura I had to look them in the eye and not let them out until they had bought something. It’s a concept that a lot of salespeople have, but I take a very different approach now.
When I started my own little business working with jewelry and crystal prisms, I no longer felt it was appropriate behavior. I felt that what I needed was just to give my customers love, and not make them feel threatened. It isn’t the easiest thing to do, when you’re having a slow day, or you’ve been given a bad spot at a crafts fair and you want to take advantage of every possible customer to make a sale.
I’ve had to do a lot of work on myself to make those changes. At first I started chanting whenever I wanted to make a sale, “Hari Aum,” or just any simple chant. I would chant, but underneath the chant I was still saying “Buy! Buy! Buy!” So there was an underlying current of thought, and I had to learn to let it all go and just give it to God.
Every time I set off to go to a show, I had to be honest with my feelings and accept the conditions that God gave me. I might have a bad spot or it would rain, and I had to learn to give it all to God and be happy, whether I had a good show or not. That was a major lesson I had to learn.
When customers came, I had to work on going out of my way to make them feel, “Look, it’s okay even if you don’t buy” – that it didn’t make a single bit of difference to me, because I would love them anyway. I found a lot of freedom in that approach, because it’s what I really did feel – I just wanted them to feel okay. At this point, it would be embarrassing to me if I sensed that they were feeling they needed to buy, or that I was trying in any way to force them. I go out of my way to make them feel relaxed in my presence, so they can feel “Buy or not, it’s perfectly all right.”
I don’t know how it’s worked out for my sales – that’s hard to gauge. But I know I feel a lot freer, because your happiness can’t be gauged by the amount of money you make.
Q: Do you enjoy the work more now?
Mary: I enjoy it a lot more. I still sometimes have shows that aren’t good sales‑wise, but I come home feeling happy. I’m more centered, more calm. And when I have a good show, it’s even trickier not to get too excited because I’m doing well, and to be even‑minded through it all.
Q: Some crafts people say it’s hard to go out and deal with hundreds of people at a big show. But you seem to have found a way to enjoy it.
Mary: Yes, I do. I try to choose the shows that are in tune with me, the ones that are held outdoors in a park, around lakes or trees, in an environment where I can look around and be reminded of God. It’s easier to see God in people when you can see Him in your environment, rather than doing shows in front of a casino or with lots of traffic going by. In those places it’s harder to remember. More and more, I’ve eliminated those shows, and I’m just keeping the shows that are in a sweet, beautiful environment.
Also, the customers feel uplifted in that kind of environment, and they’re in a happier state when they come to my booth. I have beautiful merchandise that they enjoy looking at, and if they’re relaxed, feeling they can come and go and that they don’t have to buy, it all works together. Whether I make a sale isn’t even my business – that’s up to God. And I’ve pretty much relinquished attachment to the results.
Q: Do you find that God has taken care of you?
Mary: Yes, you know, God has taken care of me.
Q: Do you feel that you’ve been able to give people something, too?
Mary: Yes, I certainly do.
Q: What is it?
Mary: Well, I feel I’m able to nurture and love people. I think people often go away feeling that. But mostly I feel it inside me. I feel I’ve been given an outlet to love and nourish others, and I’m very grateful for that. It feels a lot like a ministry.
Q: Has living in a spiritual community affected the way you do business?
Mary: Oh, yes, that’s exactly what it has done. The principles of the community are compassion and love, and being even-minded and centered. I try to take those with me when I go out to a show.
Q: Do you feel supported in the community for doing business and going out?
Mary: Yes, I do, I feel that the people here are very supportive. They’re very loving. Often they’ll tell me they admire me for being able to go out and make a living on my own.
Q: Have your spiritual practices helped you?
Mary: Yes. It would be much more difficult to do this sort of work without my spiritual practices.
Q: Do you use meditation when you’re out there?
Mary: Yes, I try to keep up a pretty good sadhana. And if I don’t, or if I lapse for a few days, especially before a show, I’ll notice the difference in how I feel. So I really try hard to keep it together.
When I’m on the road, it’s a little harder. I play spiritual tapes while I’m driving, and I chant a lot when I drive. I don’t socialize a lot, because although the people are wonderful, they socialize a little differently than I would. They’ll go out and have a beer or a steak after the show, and that’s just not what I do, so I’ll usually try to find a quiet place to be.
Q: You’re an artist and you make beautiful jewelry. Does that have a tie to your spiritual life? Are you drawn to particular kinds of artistic expression?
Mary: Actually, I’m drawn more to the selling than the artistic side. I’m constantly creating new designs, but once I get the style down, it gets a little boring, so I’ll hire someone to help. The thing I like most, and that I thrive on, is the sales, and being with the public and enjoying them. Usually the right people will come, and I’ll usually have – well, almost a blissful time. But as far as the creative work, that’s not the center of it for me now.
Q: You meet hundreds of people, and for many people that might be uncomfortable. Is there a spiritual way to relate to people during the quick encounters before they pass on?
Mary: I think of seeing God in everyone. I’ll have customers come to my booth who are angry or upset, but those things don’t upset me. I realize that God is in them, and I try to look beyond it and not take it personally. After all, I’m just a sales person. There’s no reason why I should take it personally.
I can feel the anger and the anxiety in their voice, and I just try to answer their questions as best I can and put out a loving vibration, and not react back to their anger. By not reacting to their anger, and by being in a calm space, they usually end up softening and opening up a little. Whether they buy something or not, they’ll often thank me for being there. So it’s very rewarding.
Q: You don’t seem to be a person who would reflect back hardness.
Mary: Sometimes with friends I do. I can get caught in that. But outside, it’s easier to work on it. Seeing God through a stranger and giving them love can be totally transforming. It then helps me look at the people I know and see God in them more easily.
Q: What lessons do you feel you might still have to learn?
Mary: I’m feeling that I need to put the business aside for awhile, which I’ll do when I move to Assisi. What good is a business if you can’t walk away from it? That’s the whole idea of having a business, to gain a little more freedom. Why get so stuck in your business that you can’t leave it? I feel there are other things I need to experience.
Q: Do you feel you’ve grown by doing the business?
Mary: It’s been growth‑producing. Maybe I can give you another example. I was at the county fair two years ago, and a man came up and began fussing about everything. He was saying, “Oh, there’s a chip here!” And I decided, “Well, I’m really going to cater to this guy. I’ll try to find the perfect crystal for him.” It was unbelievable the flaws he was finding – I couldn’t even see a chip, but he would say he could feel it. So I was trying to find the perfect crystal, and finally I just looked at him and said, “I bet you keep a clean house!” And he said, “Yeah, I do.” The woman with him laughed. She said, “Yeah! He does!” And he said, “Yes, I like things just a certain way.”
I said, “You know, I could tell.” I said, “I have a hard time with that myself. I wish I was more organized.” And we really got on each other’s wavelength. He was very sweet, and he ended up buying a crystal. Of course, he talked me into a discount, but that’s all right. I feel like we connected on a soul level and I made a friend. He told me about two shows that he’d seen that were really good, and I went to one later, and it was extremely successful.
Q: Pretty amazing that you were able to turn it into such an expansive encounter.
Mary: It was great. In fact, I really liked him. When he walked away, the person in the booth with me said, “Oh, he’s a sweetie, I would never have known.” There are lots of beautiful beings around, and they come up and you don’t see it. The vibration they put out is often not who they really are.
There was this other instance. A woman came up and I could see right away that she was angry. She said, “Why is this so much more than this?” And I said, “It has nothing to do with me personally. I mark up a certain percent of what it costs me, and if it doesn’t sell, or if it doesn’t look right, I’ll change things a bit. I’d be willing to sell that at a discount for you. You might be right.” And she automatically started to feel less threatened. I don’t think she ended up buying anything, but her vibration changed to where it was more peaceful. I felt she had personal problems and was just thinking “Attack the sales person!” [Laughs.] Maybe she couldn’t attack her husband, so she needed to grab me, but I just didn’t want to accept her craziness. She responded really well to the love and the honesty, and to my just treating her like a human being. It’s natural to be defensive when someone walks up and goes, “How come this is…?!!” “Because da‑da‑da‑da!!” You know, throw it back at them. But it’s nice to be centered and not accept it.