Conversations With Ananda — Ch. 11: Nayaswami Vidura: Managing a Paramhansa Yogananda World Brotherhood Community

Vidura during the first Nayaswami initiation, led by Swami Kriyananda in Assisi, Italy in 2009.

Vidura Smallen comes from a background in construction. At the time of our conversation he served as co‑general manager of the Ananda community in Nevada City, California, together with his wife, Durga. Vidura’s boundless energy and dedication to the spiritual values of kindness and service mark him as a “boss who never bosses,” and one who inspires others without seemingly trying to. 

Q: In your position as Ananda’s general manager, what does your work involve?

Vidura: Swami Kriyananda appointed Jyotish and Devi Novak as the acting spiritual directors, and my wife Durga and me as general managers. We work closely with Jyotish and Devi. I represent the left brain. My department does accounting and fundraising. But Swami Kriyananda counseled me strongly to stay in right‑brain mode, because he said we want to keep the practical and the spiritual in balance.

Q: What’s the danger in not balancing them?

Vidura: I think the danger is that if you view things too much from the practical side, you can become contractive. You can tie yourself in knots. I don’t believe we’ve ever done that, but at any rate, he was telling me to be expansive and creative.

Q: When you’re solving a problem and trying to be expansive, what’s that like?

Vidura: In our meetings with the various departments in the community, we might be tempted to say, “We don’t have enough money. Work out your own problems.” But we need to help people feel that they’re being heard and supported, and that we’ll do what we say. An obvious way to support them is to make sure we’re willing to push the envelope – that we’re aggressively but not irresponsibly expansive.

There are a lots of things we’ve done that didn’t look practical at first. Like the museum we’re building for relics related to the life of Paramhansa Yogananda. At a time when Ananda is facing a big, expensive lawsuit, I feel it’s important for us to put something significant in the ground, so that people can feel that we’re growing. It’s something positive and creative that we can focus on. “Hey, look what we did this year, despite the lawsuit.” We’re refusing to pull in our heads. We’re building something positive and serviceful, in a responsible, creative way.

So it’s aggressive expansion. We aren’t merely sitting here waiting for Divine Mother to roll out the shekels. It’s creative, expansive work, from the right brain. That’s what we mean by “expansive left‑brain” energy.

Swami has been hammering at me to be creative and expansive. But if I’m not working on a responsible, practical level, who will? Someone has to stand up for that side. So much of our energy goes into compliance with tax regulations, paying lawyers, etc. So we have to be practical, but we can’t let our practicality become stilted and uncreative.

Q: Jyotish said that you work well together. What kinds of issues come up during those meetings?

Vidura: We have a basic trust that allows us to be friends. I can talk to him about anything, and I can disagree with him about anything. We’re have an exchange of ideas that’s open and honest.

I find that he’s very flexible. I also find that he’s creatively “way out there.” You’ll get lots of misses when his ideas aren’t grounded, but sometimes you’ll make breakthroughs. I find that we’re able to arrive at solutions that we might not, if we were defensive of our positions. For example, if I stood up for the left brain all the time, “Let’s not get into that airy‑fairy stuff, because we’ll run into problems.” But we don’t talk like that. It’s been a harmonious interchange, and I greatly value his advice and insight.

When Jyotish worked at the Expanding Light, he loved to do budgets. He would use his computer to figure out all these details, and we would laugh at him. But for him, it was an exercise in understanding what was going on, so it was very practical. But that aspect of his nature also makes it easy for us to communicate. He can flip between the practical and the super‑expansive.

In terms of how we manage Ananda, I can bounce anything off of Jyotish. For example, here in the community there’s lots of pressure on people’s finances, and it’s not just a matter of whether people are getting enough money. There are philosophical issues, too. For example, what does “simple living” mean? And are you going to pay a person based on their “perceived need?” And how does “perceived need” relate to “real need?” Do we compensate people based on trying to make them comfortable, so that they don’t need to worry about financial concerns? And if we begin to get lots of money, do we start compensating people in a generous way, so they’ll have money to take a vacation in Hawaii?

Salaries are a very complex issue at Ananda, because there are different levels of compensation. A single person with a child gets paid a different rate than a couple who both work and have two children, and so on. We’re trying to come up with a plan that’s fair but easy to administer, and that makes sense. For example, there may be some people who’ve got an inheritance and don’t need a big salary, and they’ll be paid below the average.

A person may come here owing child support for a kid who’s living in Oregon. Maybe they see the child only once a year, but they still have that obligation. Or some people may have extraordinary medical needs. And because our compensation tends to run near break‑even for most people, we need to realize when people are going through emotional stresses, so that we can decide whether to give them a higher salary for a while, to help them avoid going deeply into debt.

Our system needs a degree of flex. When I look at a salary, I’d like to have the feeling that it’s been decided in the context of the guidelines we’ve set out, but also in recognition of the unique needs of the individuals or families. The policy doesn’t have to be exactly on target, but there has to be a commonly shared rationale that allows the salary to be what it needs to be.

That’s just one issue among many. It’s an ongoing process, because there will always be individual needs that have to be worked out. You’re in a monastic order, getting a salary, and you factor children into it, and then there’s housing. So it’s a complex situation.

Q: You’re involved in that issue, and at the same time you’re obligated to dive into many other issues, such as building a new office complex.

Vidura: It’s taken me quite a while to grow into the ability to go deeply into many, many issues. And one way I’ve been able to do that is by delegating to others. At one point, Latika Parojinog and I were basically doing it all. She managed the general fund, and I did the general manager’s job. Now I’ve brought many other people on, and as soon I get overwhelmed in one area, it generally means it’s time to pass along some of the work to someone who can give it a more focused energy.

Q: It sounds as if there are some high‑pressure jobs in management here. Can you talk about how people keep their heads above water?

Vidura: Swami Kriyananda has said many times that Ananda’s biggest test will be its prosperity. I think we’ve entered that test now, because we are prosperous. And at least part of our prosperity has come because we’ve become engaged in “the real world” through our businesses. Of course, we also operate in the real world through many of our internal departments. For example, the accounting department complies 100% with the tax regulations. So we have to jump through all the hoops that a normal corporation would. We also operate businesses in the outside environment. Mountain Song has to compete with the other creative boutiques in Nevada City, and Earth Song is located in a competitive area for restaurants. [Mountain Song and Earth Song were a women’s clothing and gift store and a health food store and restaurant that Ananda formerly owned in Nevada City.]

So our jobs tend to involve the same responsibilities that everyone is facing “out in the world.” They aren’t airy‑fairy toned‑down jobs especially created for devotees. They have real bottom-line accountability. And if we don’t pull our end together, we won’t be able to keep offering Paramhansa Yogananda’s teachings, and the community won’t work. So it’s a big responsibility.

Q: If a single business failed, could it drag the whole community backward?

Vidura: It could drag our whole community backward. But I think that the effort to live a balanced life without succumbing to the pressures is a fantastic opportunity to test the truth of our teachings. We’re out here in “the cold light of day,” as Sister Gyanamata put it. [Sister Gyanamata was Paramhansa Yogananda’s most spiritually advanced woman disciple. She said, “Your spirituality is tested in the cold light of day.”]

And, while we do have the support of these teachings, we also have, in some cases, difficult assignments.

Then, too, we’re aware that the world will be looking to us for an example of how to handle these difficult jobs as devotees. How can you handle the stresses and still be a devotee? It’s a challenge. I think it’s a school for realizing that God is the doer. There’s nothing fancy about it. It’s a situation where we can experiment and prove that the teachings of Paramhansa Yogananda and Swami Kriyananda give us the clarity we need to make our lives work, however difficult they may be. And for all the intensity and seriousness that I’m giving it right now, we’ve still got to remain light in our consciousness.

Just three days ago there was a big earthquake in Southern California, and who knows, our businesses may be gone next week. So I think we have to remember the cosmic perspective. I think that what enables us to do it is by living close to the source of sure and true guidance. I keep Yogananda’s picture on the wall, and I never go by it without trying to get my mind back to that vibration. I don’t have a meeting but that someone is sitting under Yogananda’s picture, and I have to look at Master while I’m talking to them. I do lots of things like that, to keep reminding myself.

If I see that one of the people I work with is getting “off” a little spiritually, I’ll ask them not to come to work in the morning until they’ve meditated for an hour. Because we have to put that first. And that’s the balance.

Q: Does it work? Are people doing their jobs well, and are they balanced and happy?

Vidura: I think that people are very successful at their jobs. But I will say this. I think we are approaching a major adjustment at Ananda. I think we’ve pushed it to the limit in terms of putting ourselves in stressful situations, and creating new jobs that have too much stress built in. We’ve created family and housing situations that are too pressurized. And I think we’re entering a time now when it will be appropriate to go back to our roots, and once again raise the flag for “plain living and high thinking.”

[Paramhansa Yogananda urged people to create communities such as Ananda where people could gather together with others of like mind and practice “plain living and high thinking.”]

We’ll need to rediscover ways to cooperate, ways to cut down on the need for such pressurized lifestyles. Because I see a danger in that. I see lots of people having a hard time handling the pressures they’re facing in living here, and in their jobs.

Q: Do you also find that people get relief when they need it? Or do they simply crash and burn? Does the community go through cycles of pressure and easing‑off?

Vidura: Yes, I think we do go through those cycles. But I think it may be important to consider some basic changes that will relieve those pressures. The warning bells go off when ten percent of the population are experiencing extreme difficulties. I think there will always be a certain number of people who are on an “up” or a “down” cycle. But when the proportion begins to shift out of a certain normal range, those warning bells start telling me that we’d better look at the system. Because in that case, it’s not just the person “experiencing their stuff.” And we need to adjust the system.

Q: There, again, the spiritual principles of expansion come in, don’t they – thinking of people’s needs?

Vidura: Yes. We haven’t talked about that. But it’s a guideline that I try to live by, to look at the individual’s needs first. That doesn’t mean that a person who’s having a hard time and driving everybody nuts is the only one whose needs need to be looked at. Because the needs of the person who’s trying to manage or counsel them also have to be considered. So there’s a balance.

We have the Ananda motto, “People are more important than things.” But it’s not as easy as walking in the door and championing the underdog and smacking the managers around because they’ve “mistreated” these people. It’s not that simplistic at all. Usually, it’s very much more complex. But the principle still holds that we pick it up first from the perspective of the individual, and not the organization.

Q: Do you receive guidance in your meditations and prayers?

Vidura: I find that if I take the time to be calm and listen, then I do get good guidance. I would say that when I do that, my guidance is exceptionally clear. In fact, I feel that I hardly ever make a mistake, if I can first get calm enough to listen to my intuition.

God gives real good guidance, if you take the time to listen to it. My experience is that it’s pretty close to infallible. I don’t have visions; it’s just that if I’m moving in the wrong direction, I’ll feel it as a nervousness in my heart. I know that I can always go inside and feel if it’s right or wrong.

Q: God seems to push us sometimes for no other reason than to force us to call on Him and develop that relationship. With the pressures you’ve been talking about, do you think that maybe they exist for that reason?

Vidura: I think we generally need to get hit over the head before we’re prepared to listen. Our egos need to get pretty well devastated before we’ll soften up enough to be willing to really listen to Divine Mother. Look around you. It happens a lot, to good people. We’re living in a community where it’s very easy to pass judgment on one another, because we can so easily see the mistakes the other people are making. But where are you going to find people who are willing to lay their lives out in front of others like that? I come from a background of being a strong, silent type, male, completely self‑contained.

Q: I met your dad once. He was very much like that.

Vidura: Yes, very much like that. Not needing anyone. “I can take care of myself.” And I was appalled at first, at people’s ability here in the community to have a very messy, emotional divorce, for example. A divorce with accusations and love‑triangles, all of this stuff, that would take place right in the middle of our home here. This happens, we’ve all seen it – and then for the husband and wife to be able to both stay here, both remain in the community, and let the other one get married. You know, they both remain here and stay committed to the work and keep going. That’s been extremely impressive, because my inner instinct would be to say “My God, if something like that were to happen to me, I’d be gone. I’d be right out the door.” I wouldn’t leave Master, but I couldn’t possibly do something like that in front of all my brothers and sisters. And then, as I think about it, my hat goes off to people who can go through that and hold theire heads high and smile and go on.

Q: I remember praying to God once as the Divine Mother, and getting an intuitive reply: “I am not interested in your faults. I am interested only in your continual improvement.”

Vidura: Yes. And seeing Swami’s unbelievable ability to look at every person in terms of their highest potential. Someone will be mentioned for a job, or Swami will bring up someone’s name for a project, and I’ll think, “Oh my God, they’ve just ruined that department!” Or they’ve just gotten a divorce, or they’ve made a wreck of their personal lives, or their finances are shot. But he doesn’t see it like that at all. He looks at that soul as a potential, with no judgment on the past. Like you were saying about Divine Mother’s response. He’s such an example in that way. He says, “Look at this one! Just look at his potential. Look at these attributes. Look at what he could do!”

Q: It’s astounding.

Vidura: It’s astounding, yes. And I’ve seen it over and over. I see it as an example for all of us to try to emulate. I’m in a position where I’m hiring and firing all the time, moving people from here to there. So over the years I’ve really watched how Swami Kriyananda works with people. And he sets truly a great example.

Q: Do you find that you’re learning the same tolerance for people’s faults?

Vidura: Yes, because I’ve been seriously trying to. For a long time, I used to read the leadership book once a week. [The Art of Supportive Leadership, published under Swami Kriyananda’s American name, J. Donald Walters.]

We’re here as disciples. We’re trying to learn. And wherever we’ve been placed, we need to realize that it’s an opportunity to grow, if we’ll only take it. And we can then thank Master for the opportunities we’ve been given. I see my position as an opportunity for growth. I see what I might have done, if I hadn’t had the good karma to be able to say “yes” often enough to Swami – to have sufficient willingness to say “yes” to some of the things that I assumed at first were way, way beyond my capabilities.

No way would I ever have perceived myself being able to do some of the things I’ve been asked to do. Fortunately, I’ve been able to do most of them with some degree of success. But that wasn’t the measure – whether the project was successful. It was more a measure of my willingness to put myself on the line. If you say yes to God’s will for you, I don’t know if the outcome will always be successful. You might have to accept that God’s will may be for you to get your hands slapped. But the fact that you’re willing to say yes and give it your all is the most important thing. And then, let the fruits of it fall into His hands. And then to be able to accept that.

Q: That has brought growth for you?

Vidura: Oh, yes. Beyond any desire on my part to grow at that rate. [Vidura laughs uproariously.] Because obviously, to go through the pain that that rate of growth produces – I wouldn’t mind taking four or five years and just sitting on a beach in Hawaii. Once in awhile, that thought comes to my mind. But I feel that we’re here to live a life that can make a difference, for our spiritual growth, and because we’re serving a work that can serve millions all over the world. And when you step back and look at it, what more could you ask?

Q: Do you look back and see that it has been a joy, to scramble around doing God’s will?

Vidura: Yes. I have no bad thoughts, looking back. I think about that sometimes. When I was going through it, sometimes all I could see was the hard times and the stresses. But, boy, I look back at these twenty years and I say, “God, what a blessing, and what a joy it’s been!” I wouldn’t do any of it differently, in hindsight. I would only try to do it better.

 

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