{"id":1683,"date":"2024-11-09T16:54:12","date_gmt":"2024-11-09T16:54:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.yoganandafortheworld.com\/story\/?p=1683"},"modified":"2024-11-09T16:54:12","modified_gmt":"2024-11-09T16:54:12","slug":"swami-kriyananda-stories-ch-20-knee-to-knee-with-swamiji","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.yoganandafortheworld.com\/story\/swami-kriyananda-stories-ch-20-knee-to-knee-with-swamiji\/","title":{"rendered":"Swami Kriyananda Stories — Ch. 20: Knee to Knee With Swamiji"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Photo:<\/a>
Photo: A pool party at Crystal Hermitage. The children dance to Swamiji\u2019s song, \u201cCherry Blossoms in Kyoto.\u201d<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

This is for those quiet souls who feel awkward in crowds and on social occasions.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I was thrilled to move to Ananda. At last! I rejoiced, I could live among people who shared my spiritual ideals. We could talk about anything<\/em> \u2013 Reincarnation! Yogananda! Devotion! When we went to the outhouse, we could shout \u201cHari bol!\u201d to see if it was occupied.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m being silly \u2013 I doubt there are any outhouses at the Village now.<\/p>\n

My point is that Ananda felt like home. I recognized a quality in the people that I longed to have for myself. It was an unspoken joy and inner composure that I saw in their eyes.<\/p>\n

If this was my home and my spiritual family, I felt that I should be part of what was going on. I longed to emerge from my hermit\u2019s shell, and to belong. But as a lifelong recluse, I had no proper compass for how to be an extrovert, and as I\u2019ve mentioned, I went about it in the wrong way.<\/p>\n

Swamiji encouraged me not to put on an act, but to be what I was. Swamiji\u2019s \u201cright-hand man,\u201d Jyotish, repeated Swamiji\u2019s counsel. He said, \u201cYour role is not<\/em> a public one, giving talks and being the life of the party.\u201d He said, \u201cYour role is to be somewhat apart and to write about Ananda.\u201d<\/p>\n

What is it about life\u2019s loners and recluses that prompts us to go against our natural grain? A lunatic inspiration takes hold, as we watch life\u2019s natural-born party planners and banquet organizers having so much fun \u2013 laughing gaily and conversing easily with the teacher.<\/p>\n

If I ever tried to be falsely effusive, Swamiji would become somewhat distant. It was painful to feel that I wasn\u2019t part of the \u201cscene\u201d \u2013 until I learned to accept and be comfortable with my nature.<\/p>\n

I began to learn how to relate to Swamiji at a time when my wife and I were having difficulties in our relationship. I wrote to him, requesting his prayers for us, and the next day he called and invited me to come to his home to talk.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t like to take up his time, feeling that he could use it to help people with problems more serious than mine. So I said, \u201cI really don\u2019t have to\u2026\u201d But Swamiji interrupted, \u201cNo, it\u2019s important. Come on over.\u201d<\/p>\n

I arrived ten minutes before the appointed time and sat on the steps outside his house, trying to get in the proper frame of mind for a serious conversation.<\/p>\n

I thought, \u201cI am not<\/em> here to get a pat on the head. I\u2019m not here for Swami to recognize or praise me. I\u2019m here to ask for his help with the troubles we\u2019re having.\u201d<\/p>\n

Swami answered the door and said, \u201cLet\u2019s go to the office in the music studio.\u201d<\/p>\n

I followed him through the hall to the office, where he pointed to a comfortable chair and invited me to sit. He then drew a second chair so close that when he sat our knees were nearly touching.<\/p>\n

I knew that he was responding to my thought that I didn\u2019t want to be coddled. He gave me valuable suggestions for how I could help create harmony in our marriage.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m writing this to help others whose nature, like mine, is quiet and reclusive, and who might not feel that they are wholly part of Ananda.<\/strong><\/p>\n

In that vein, I\u2019ll share another story.<\/p>\n

It was a hot summer day, and Swamiji had invited the members to a pool party at Crystal Hermitage.<\/p>\n

When we arrived, I jumped in the pool and found a quiet corner, where I began my usual practice of trying to forget myself, by choosing one person and praying for them. Soon I was feeling inwardly blissful and happy, not needing to be part of the scene.<\/p>\n

Later, we gathered on the patio for tea and treats while Swamiji talked with us.<\/p>\n

At one point, he mentioned the English humorist, P.\u00a0G.\u00a0Wodehouse. I\u2019m paraphrasing, but Swamiji said something like, \u201cWodehouse was a typical writer, in that he wasn\u2019t comfortable in social situations. One time, he was traveling to England on an ocean liner, and the captain asked him to read a chapter of his latest book to the passengers. Well, he got up and sort of mumbled inaudibly.\u201d<\/p>\n

Swamiji then looked at me with a kindly smile. He said, \u201cLook at Rambhakta \u2013 he\u2019s like that, too. He doesn\u2019t say much, but he can really put it down in writing.\u201d<\/p>\n

Wallflower that I was, I wanted to fade into the rock wall behind my chair.<\/p>\n

Swamiji then changed the subject. I turned to Asha who was sitting nearby and chuckled, \u201cWell, I guess he\u2019s given me permission to be the way I am.\u201d<\/p>\n

Swamiji interrupted what he was saying and shouted across the patio, \u201cWhat did he say?\u201d<\/p>\n

Asha yelled back, \u201cHe said you\u2019ve given him permission to be the way he is!\u201d Rambhakta, the hermit, melted deeper into the wall. Swamiji looked at me and smiled happily.<\/p>\n

When the party was over, I was exhausted. I had expended so much energy praying for others that I had the energy of a wet dishrag.<\/p>\n

I was dismayed to see that Swamiji was sitting by the door where people were filing out, and that we would have to pass and say something to him. I had no energy for a social encounter. I thought about hightailing it over the garden fence. When we drew near, I could only mumble, \u201cThanks for having us,\u201d and stagger out.<\/p>\n

Later, I reflected that I must not have found the best \u201cmethod\u201d for surviving spiritually in social situations. Praying for others was<\/em> an excellent way to forget myself, but it didn\u2019t seem to be the final answer. As an all-purpose method, it was too complex and exhausting.<\/p>\n

There were too many situations where it wasn\u2019t possible to spend a half-hour preparing to forget myself. Circumstances often required that I interact spontaneously, in the moment. People would pop around a corner and want to talk.<\/p>\n

Years later, Asha would give me priceless advice for harmonizing my relationship with Ishani. She said, very quietly, \u201cIf you could go to Divine Mother in the moment\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Whenever I practiced her counsel, I found Divine Mother responding willingly \u2013 when I prayed not for myself or to be rescued, but that She give me the kindness and compassion to help others \u2013 to be on their side.<\/p>\n

Soon I was practicing the \u201cnew method\u201d in other situations. If I had to meet people or talk with strangers, it required only a heartfelt prayer, \u201cDivine Mother, show me how to behave!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

If I was sincere and committed to follow the guidance that came, this small prayer reliably brought help in countless situations where I would otherwise have floundered. I recommend it to everyone, not introverts only.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This is for those quiet souls who feel awkward in crowds and on social occasions. I was thrilled to move to Ananda. At last! I rejoiced, I could live among people who shared my spiritual ideals. We could talk about anything \u2013 Reincarnation! Yogananda! Devotion! When we went to the outhouse, we could shout \u201cHari … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1683","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nSwami Kriyananda Stories — Ch. 20: Knee to Knee With Swamiji - Swami Kriyananda: Lightbearer<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A 58-year disciple of Paramhansa Yogananda tells how Swami Kriyananda helped him learn to behave.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.yoganandafortheworld.com\/story\/swami-kriyananda-stories-ch-20-knee-to-knee-with-swamiji\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" 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